Blondey

[NumeroUno]

A blonde finds herself in serious trouble. Her business has gone bust
and she's in dire financial straits. She's so desperate that she
decides to ask God for help.

She begins to pray... "God, please help me. I've lost my business
and if I don't get some money, I'm going to lose my house as well. Please let me win the lottery."

Lottery night comes, and somebody else wins.

She again prays... "God, please let me win the lottery! I've lost my
business, my house and I'm going to lose my car as well."

Lottery night comes and she still has no luck.

Once again, she prays... "My God, why have you forsaken me? I've
lost my business, my house, and my car. My children are starving.

I don't often ask You for help, and have always been a good servant to You.

PLEASE let me win the lottery just this one time so I can get my life back in order."

Suddenly there is a blinding flash of light as the heavens open.
The blonde is overwhelmed by the Voice of God, Himself.....

"Sweetheart, work with Me on this..... Buy a ticket."

[rediman]

A young ventriloquist was doing his show one night at a club. With his dummy on his knee, he starts going thru his usual "dumb blonde" jokes, when a blonde women in the fourth row stands on her chair and starts to shout:

"I've heard enough of your stupid blonde jokes. What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What does the color of a women's hair have to do with her worth as a human being? It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected in the community & in the workplace, and from reaching our full potential as a person. Because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against not only blondes, but women in general.....all in the name of humor!"

The embarrassed ventriloquist begins to apologize, and the blonde yells, "You stay out of this mister, I'm talking to that little shit on your knee!"

[cracker]

ha