Do your team parents grumble too?

[carolinafan]

Been a parent of DD on a club team for 4 years-two different organizations. Both teams seem to have a lot of problems but of different types. First team, all parents and players seemed to get along well but the head coach had his head up his butt and team did not do well. Second team (present one 14U) has very sound coaching, but the parents are grumbling all the time. With 13 girls rostered and all showing up each weekend, it is hard to keep everyone happy. Plus, coach believes seeding games are extremely important, so rarely, if ever (big lead) changes lineup around. I understand the parents of the kids sitting game after game being upset, but what has me baffled is that even the parents of the kids that play every inning of every game are chattering about things that piss them off. We have come in first or second for the 6 tournaments we have entered....2 ASA, 2 PONY, 1 NSA, and 1 USSSA. My question is: is this normal behavior for parents to b@tch and moan about things even when their dd is playing and they are winning like crazy? I have to also add, that the team always goes out to dinner on the sponsors with the coaches, so the parents stay back at the hotel drinking and kubbitzing (sp???). We all have a VERY GOOD time but still the talk is disconcerting.

[Skarp]

Been a parent of DD on a club team for 4 years-two different organizations. Both teams seem to have a lot of problems but of different types. First team, all parents and players seemed to get along well but the head coach had his head up his butt and team did not do well. Second team (present one 14U) has very sound coaching, but the parents are grumbling all the time. With 13 girls rostered and all showing up each weekend, it is hard to keep everyone happy. Plus, coach believes seeding games are extremely important, so rarely, if ever (big lead) changes lineup around. I understand the parents of the kids sitting game after game being upset, but what has me baffled is that even the parents of the kids that play every inning of every game are chattering about things that piss them off. We have come in first or second for the 6 tournaments we have entered....2 ASA, 2 PONY, 1 NSA, and 1 USSSA. My question is: is this normal behavior for parents to b@tch and moan about things even when their dd is playing and they are winning like crazy? I have to also add, that the team always goes out to dinner on the sponsors with the coaches, so the parents stay back at the hotel drinking and kubbitzing (sp???). We all have a VERY GOOD time but still the talk is disconcerting.

It's "kibitzing." And there's not a problem with it, IMO (hey, parents need to have fun too), as long as neither its purpose nor practical effect is to undermine the coaching staff or team morale.

Your title says "grumble" though, and grumbling is different from merely kibitzing. Grumbling could be a problem.

We talk some serious smack on our team...about the coaches, each others' kids, each other, etc...but it's all in good fun.

[bunt-n-run]

It's fine when you share an opinion as to what you would have done different in a given situation. (the coach shoulda done this or shoulda done that). Sharing that same opinion as if what you would have done would have positively and absolutely worked for sure, makes you an idiot!

Or the inventor of the Magic-8-Ball

[carolinafan]

Yeah Skarp, it's mostly talking smack and most of us are too drunk to remember....unfortunately, I always seem to be the one leaving to make sure all the girls get to bed when our DDs get back.....sometimes I actually trust them to go to bed and return for the bullsh@t/drinking sessions. But lately, a lot of second guessing is going on. I used to coach and know this occurs behind coaches' backs, but I hope it does not spread to the point where it affects the girls.....hearing parents talk smack and taking it to heart.

[DonnieS]

Your title says "grumble" though, and grumbling is different from merely kibitzing. Grumbling could be a problem.

We talk some serious smack on our team...about the coaches, each others' kids, each other, etc...but it's all in good fun.

Normal here definitely - the parents all talk good playful smack to me on the field, fortunately I am on my way to probably 50% deaf. They mistake the smile on my face for me being good natured - I just dont hear it.

[hotwheels]

Always keep in mind that some people like to bitch just to bitch......Almost every team has a couple if not more......These types of people can and will be cancerous and if your team has more than maybe 1 or 2 I recommend saying good bye! Let them go to THAT team where their kid will start every game at short and pitch and bat leadoff.....You know....That team they will always refer to when they are talking to other parents about GOOD they do it over there.....

[Skarp]

They mistake the smile on my face for me being good natured...

Don't worry Donnie...we would never make that mistake.

[Tucson]

Yes, people like to biotch and moan. They also like to gossip.

It took me until my oldest was about 15, to figure out how contagious and hurtful that is.

I stay away from it like the plague, now.

If a DD isn't starting she needs to double up on her effort. The time spent drinking should be spent with DD.

MOO

[GIMNEPIWO]

Yes, people like to biotch and moan. They also like to gossip.

It took me until my oldest was about 15, to figure out how contagious and hurtful that is.

I stay away from it like the plague, now.

If a DD isn't starting she needs to double up on her effort. The time spent drinking should be spent with DD.

MOO

What a Biotch !

[greenandblue]

The grumbling, and biotching parents at 12u and 14u turns into ugly backstabbers at 16u and 18u. Running the other way from a team like this is a great idea, unfortunately your next team is going to be just as bad. You just have to hope that you find the one team where it is tolerable.
If your daughter is genuinely happy on a team, leave her there, and just do your best to ignore the parents. Better yet, just make fun of the ugly parents, it can be quite entertaining, especially if you are good at impersonations. (And after a few drinks).