If I had it to do over again..........

[hit4power]

One thing to always keep in mind is this: For 99.99% of college softball players, their softball careers end at graduation. So pick a school and division level that is right for your daughter. Concentrate on academic scholarships, not athletic scholarships. Her college years should be about preparing for a career and life, and playing college ball is just icing on the cake. My DD is having the time of her life, having a great sophomore year at the D3 level, making friendships that will last a lifetime, studying for a career that is her passion, playing for some of the best and most caring coaches you will find, and preparing for the NCAA Regionals this weekend.

I cannot ask for anything more.

Bingo! I, too, could not ask for a better outcome and my kid is doing the same thing this weekend

I agree with nearly everything that has been posted above. Ignore the noise, let it be fun, listen to your kid, get her as much exposure to college campuses, college coaches, and college players as you can. It will help her understand whether she does or doesn't want to play college ball (and if so, at what level) and at the end of the day, it's her decision.

One thing I didn't understand as early as I wish I had. 18G ball (and to a large extent 16U ball) is all about college exposure. Pick a team that can get your DD the exposure you want. Ask a lot of questions of the coaches, don't apologize for being a pain about it, really make sure you will get what you want and what you are paying for before you commit yourself and your DD to a team.

[Battle]

Please complete this sentence: If I had it to do all over again, I would do this:

If I had it to do over again, I would have never enticed her to play other sports and not buy into "studies show...blah blah blah".

[blue76]

If I had a do over... I would... Stop chasing the scholarship and just let me daughter play ball for fun. Now to be clear... my daughter plays at an SEC school and softball and got her that "big scholarship" she wanted. But the stress and the schedule those girls have to keep while maintaining grades is brutal. Aside from that it costs a fortune for us to watch her play. No way I can go to even half the games due to time from work and the simple cost of travel. I wish she played somewhere closer... But that is selfish of me I guess.

I spent WAY more on travel softball than any scholarship will ever cover. I could have sent her to any in state school for less than what we have invested in travel softball. But... she wouldn't have the experience I guess.

Also... I would not have travelled to California, Colorado, Utah and all those other places to play all the time. Spent thousands of dollars just so the same coaches can come watch them play. It is silly... We play in Atlanta or Chattanooga which is close to home and it is the exact same coaches watching in California and Colorado. Seems goofy to me.

Travel ball has gotten too big IMO... let the kids play locally and save your money until 16U at least...

[fasterpitch92701]

Gawd... hard to answer. Get on the best TB team possible, early on, one that gets on fields that actually have coaches watching. Grades; hasn't been an issue for DD (thankfully) but for many others, I can only suggest that grades are more important than a batting average. Really. Play because you WANT to play, not because your parents want you to play. Save up for college e-a-r-l-y. Scholarship commentary and stories are, perpetually, filled with b.s.. Choose your college/university with NO thought about playing softball. If you wouldn't want to go there if you didn't play ball, don't. Softball lasts 4 years. No one is playing pro ball, really. A quality education at a school that "fits" lasts a lifetime. The key is fit. Fit, fit, fit. Find the right schools, narrow it down, THEN consider softball. Most TB coaches are well intended but not saints nor experts. Find the best coach to develop the skills YOU want. Know that TB coaching is a business, as is college ball. That is reality and it may not meld with your perspective. Prioritize early and often, making it an expertise. It will last a lifetime and certainly save you a lot of grief in college. Focus on what matters to you. Focus, be intense, upbeat, positive, constructive and supportive. Help others. And... learn to enjoy the game as a player... and as a parent.

[exD1dad]

Great topic, too bad their aren't more hard luck stories shared to help others. fasterpitchdad great advice but would you change anything?

I asked my DD this question yesterday, she thought for a minute, then said " My 1st year when I started in 12U & went down to 10U for Fall ball in Sierra Madre & had to pitch with a small ball..yeah that's all Dad" OK so it was her 1st year (age 10) & I hadn't yet discovered the benefits of the 'bucket. Seriously I learned so much, found teams, & have gotten great laughs here

Battle, my DD began training & competing in 2 sports simultaneously this year (she's a HS Junior) softball & Track Cycling on Velodromes. She couldn't be happier & wants to be the 1st kid from her school to compete for a National Championship in 2 sports at the same time. She was "discovered" by an amazing coach & spent 2 weeks training with members of the USA, Canadian & Trinidad & Tobago National teams is lowering her times & improving in quantum leaps weekly. She's already put numbers that would have medaled last year at Jr Nat's & has home Velo advantage @ the Velo Sports Center in Carson CA for Jr Nat's ! Now all we gotta do is find a team to pick her up for PGF (she does have a lifetime .378 average & 1 year of eligibility @ 16's) & hope her performance @ Pennsbury yields the results from the schools she's been in contact with since they saw her tape & she got in the OnDeck camp because she's worked so hard in the classroom & on the field

Time will tell

[Safebyahare]

RE: the OP, Simply put: Would have said "no" more often. Just in general. That's it.

[fasterpitch92701]

exD1Dad... change... I would have left a marginal team with a marginal coach (who was in it for the money) earlier. I would have spent less time going to Surf City Tourneys that were, often, poorly attended by coaches. I would have believed less in the ethics of who gets picked at tryouts. I would pay attention to the relationship between coach and assistant coach if the assistant had a daughter on the team, particularly one with very marginal talent. I would have assumed most, but NOT all, coaches know less than you think. I would have made it more "fun" for my daughter in any way possible, although she sure does enjoy it. I would have told her I am proud of her more often.

[exD1dad]

Fasterpitchdad Now that's that's what I'm talking about!!

All 10U, 12U & 14U TB parents should print out your last comment & read it yearly

[Battle]

Battle, my DD began training & competing in 2 sports simultaneously this year (she's a HS Junior) softball & Track Cycling on Velodromes. She couldn't be happier & wants to be the 1st kid from her school to compete for a National Championship in 2 sports at the same time. She was "discovered" by an amazing coach & spent 2 weeks training with members of the USA, Canadian & Trinidad & Tobago National teams is lowering her times & improving in quantum leaps weekly. She's already put numbers that would have medaled last year at Jr Nat's & has home Velo advantage @ the Velo Sports Center in Carson CA for Jr Nat's ! Now all we gotta do is find a team to pick her up for PGF (she does have a lifetime .378 average & 1 year of eligibility @ 16's) & hope her performance @ Pennsbury yields the results from the schools she's been in contact with since they saw her tape & she got in the OnDeck camp because she's worked so hard in the classroom & on the field

Time will tell

Sounds like you have a great kid. Just know that there are dangers in other sports that can end your kid's career especially as a pitcher. Volleyball is one of them. Hindsight is 20/20 and I was speaking on our experience. May not be the protocol for most.

[fasterpitch92701]

exD1dad... forgot at least one.... practice more with your daughter. Just you and her. Throwing, ground balls, flies, catching.... it doesn't really matter. It doesn't need to be brilliant, esoteric, technical or exemplary. Rather... it's time with your daughter and you, together, doing something she loves to do and you can actively support. Bonding. Building. Growing. Yes, she does it with the team and the coach and gawd knows who else but there is nothing like some "quiet time" that isn't really quiet, you and her, together, doing something fun as father/mother/daughter. She will not forget it. You won't either. It's a no lose situation and both of you will win big time. Guaranteed. Cherish every moment.