Is there no more loyalty in softball

[wcwolf05]

I see your points, i should be happy that they feel they can go on to bigger teams now and play innings, I get girls and parents coming up to us and still thank us for what we did for them when they were in rec ball 5 years ago and how they still use what we taught them. That always make us feel good.

But dam I hate seeing the good ones go.. O well ,, move to the next project..

[coachEd]

Just curious Mr. Wolf, but I suspect that you would have had the same reaction (i.e., pissed off because you lost a good player) if this same kid left your team to play for another team in the same age division as yours rather than 18u, but which is much higher up on the food chain for recruiting and that is going to be on the right fields where most of the coaches will be, and where that team might have a coach or an organization head with alot of experience with recruiting to help the kid more than you could have? Heck, even the top organization teams (at all ages) have good players that move on to another team (maybe within the same org, or to another one of the top orgs) for one reason or another.

[DonnieS]

This post comes up every year, as most of you know, its a disappointing thing when it happens - by that I dont mean leaving for an obvious better situation, like was mentioned about someone going to play on a team that has more recruiting opportunities. I had a great kid, plays for a Big 12 team, that I picked up when her previous team fell apart. I had always thought she was going to the big show - great kid, great family. There came a time when I wasnt getting the fields at the showcases that she needed to be seen on, and it was tough but I called a buddy who ran a very high visibility organization - and then talked to her and her family, we all agreed it was the right thing for her, still was tough to do.

But the other situation - other local team - a very persuasive - but very low integrity coach - who would call this family and bug the s out of them, telling them he was the better route to the big time that my team was. While I had a few that went to the big time, he had none - nada - zero.
But I had the attitude of "if you want to go , dont let the door hit you in the xxx". I never meant to take anyone back - but I took one kid back - 4 times - yep 4. Even my own kid, who was close friends with this kid - said to me, 'Dad, give it up - how many times are you going to take her back?'. But everyone has had these situations, the kid needed us more than we needed them - anyway the parents would apologize - and I couldnt say no to the kid. She played a year of juco - and quit , kind of what I thought would happen but she tells me she had a blast playing with us - so alls well.

This stuff comes with the territory - just dont be stupid about it. (and yes, the pot is calling the kettle black.)

[Sam]

Just curious Mr. Wolf, but I suspect that you would have had the same reaction (i.e., pissed off because you lost a good player) if this same kid left your team to play for another team in the same age division as yours rather than 18u, but which is much higher up on the food chain for recruiting and that is going to be on the right fields where most of the coaches will be, and where that team might have a coach or an organization head with alot of experience with recruiting to help the kid more than you could have? Heck, even the top organization teams (at all ages) have good players that move on to another team (maybe within the same org, or to another one of the top orgs) for one reason or another.

The highlighted text above is the single most BS mistruth which is solely promulgated by the coaches who "play on the good fields." The truth is that the player will much more likely be recruited by a coach the PLAYER CONTACTS vs. the coach happening to see a player at a field where they were looking at another player or maybe just hanging out. One thing is definitely for sure.....the kid will see less playing time on the "better" team and the kid will receive much less coaching and the coaching they do receive is mostly worthless.

[Gone in 2.6]

Is there no more loyalty in softball

Was there ever?

[softball_parent]

I believe there has never been however softball pretty much represents the adult world where there isn't any loyalty either. Just look around. Better prepares them for the adult world where not everyone gets a trophy and bosses don't care about not damaging your self esteem and where you are not the center of your parent's universe.

[SoftballMomSC]

Well, I'll tell you that my daughter was loyal to her team of 7 years. The only travel team she'd ever played on, coached by the man who taught her to play (in rec ball) softball when she was 6. It was the "dream team," putting it bluntly. They won state championships, went undefeated in the 2011 Triple Crown Rising Stars Summer Nationals, played in the ASA Hall of Fame Tournament in OKC summer of 2011... It was like our family (you know, you spend THAT much time with the same people and they become like family!) and the coach and his wife were people we considered our best friends. Coach even told us many times that he considered our daughter one of his own. We were all THAT close. Until, coach decided he needed MORE for his daughter. During a showcase tournament, he provoked my daughter, getting up in her face and yelling at her. We knew SOMETHING had been wrong, as she had begun saying that she didn't want him to coach her any more, although she still LOVED her team. Well, she'd had enough of his nonsense and when he provoked her that one last time, she reacted in such a way that he decided that would be her last tournament with the team (she gave him the ole hand under the chin "flip off"). No, we don't condone it and there was no excuse for it, but he's an adult provoking a 14 year old child, for pete's sake! He had her be the closing pitcher for that game and then gave her the boot, not even allowing her to finish the tournament. Well... less than two months later, the team was no more. He'd planned all along to take his daughter and one other player (asst. coach's daughter) and go to a different, "more prestigious" team and leave the rest of the girls without a team. Even his other asst. coach was clueless. Leaving the team to be coached by someone else apparently wasn't in his plans. He destroyed the team! Fortunately, my daughter is now the #1 pitcher for one of the top organizations in this state and a few of her former teammates have found decent teams, but some have pretty much given up. He took their spirit. The funny thing is, he and his asst. and their daughters spent only one season on that "prestigious" team and word is that they were asked to leave. He's now with another organization and the asst. is still looking for her daughter a home team. So, NO, there is no loyalty, anymore. And, be very careful who you THINK is your friend and who you trust with your children. My husband and I and our daughter are STILL very hurt by the actions of this one man, as are a whole team of girls and their families. Now, this man, who was always the emergency contact for our children (on school forms and such) doesn't even acknowledge us at tournaments. He just walks on by. Things can certainly change in the blink of an eye and one coach can really ruin a girl's love for the game.

[ontheblack]

I believe the word loyalty is one of the most over-used terms in TB. Instead of loyalty, think in terms of commitment. Every season starts fresh. You commit for the season. You honor your commitment. No more, no less.

The reality is that many teams started from rec, but things do change, whether we want them to or not. If you dont walk into this with the proper perspective, either as coach or parent, you will likely be disappointed.

[Iluvblue]

I want to be as loyal as I possibly can to my players... and I will do everything possible to NOT replace a player with another player at the end of a season, but as they move up in my organization, they MUST be able to plat at the Gold level, or i can not make a spot for them. Im not talking about being the best, im just saying they need to do the things I need them to do.

Im likely not having a tryout for our Gold team, and possibly not even for 16u. That is about as loyal as you can expect from any Gold coach, Id say.

i have 14 players on the Gold team, and only way I probably add a kid if they all want to return, is if a Jenny Finch showed up and wanted to pitch for us. But if a player shows (by her play) that she simply can not compete at the same level as her teamates, I simply can not keep that kid, no matter how loyal I want to be.