High School Daughter loses interest due to HS Program

[Black Mamba]

Well my dd is a freshman this year and the politics have already started, but we will play anyway. I had a D-1 top 20 program coach tell me that high school ball is not where they recruit from but they still expect you to play and try to improve your skills regardless of the coach. He also said just enjoy the high school season as much as possible and use it to work on your weak spots.

[Rootingforsis]

Was told by a college coach to advise my freshman DD that high school would be the first time she would play on a team where more than a few of her teammates and her teammates parents did not want her to succeed.

Instead they wanted her to fail so that they or their DD's could start ahead of her. The college coach said that despite the drama, for the most part, on a travel team all of the players/parents want each other to succeed because everyone just wants to win. In high school, too often, it is just about having a starting position, especially upper classmen.


At the time, I didn't fully apprecite the advice. Afterwards, I decided the college coach was dead on. My DD learned valuable life lessons in high school about "friendship," "team work," and "coaching" that she had never really experienced before in travel ball. It all was, to say the least, an eye opener.

The sad part is, the college coach explained, that college ball is sometimes more like high school in this regard so this coach wants her players to play high school ball to learn how to deal with these kinds of teammates, teammates parents, teammates' boyfriends, etc. and the different pressures it creates that are generally absent froim travel ball.

[Black Mamba]

Rootingforsis I have to agree with everything you said especially the upper classmen part I just hope Its not to the point that my dd wants to quit. By the way are any Heybucket people going to the High School Tourney in Roundrock the 9-10 of Jan.

[DonnieS]

Rootingforsis I have to agree with everything you said especially the upper classmen part I just hope Its not to the point that my dd wants to quit. By the way are any Heybucket people going to the High School Tourney in Roundrock the 9-10 of Jan.

Yep - I will be there coaching the TM Cherokees.

[anonlooker]

As to playing upper classmen just because they are seniors, is softball in a bubble on this, or does it happen in all girl's sports?

I've never heard of it in boy's sports, and can't imagine sitting a freshman QB sensation who could take you to the 'ship in favor of some senior kid who has simply hung on the team for a few years.

Are girls teams run differently in this regard?

[DonnieS]

As to playing upper classmen just because they are seniors, is softball in a bubble on this, or does it happen in all girl's sports?

I've never heard of it in boy's sports, and can't imagine sitting a freshman QB sensation who could take you to the 'ship in favor of some senior kid who has simply hung on the team for a few years.

Are girls teams run differently in this regard?

Dont know about all that - but my older daughter sat her freshman year of h/s, except for running bases. The previous summer and fall, she played s/s on her travel team, a pretty respectable team and hit leadoff for them. On her h/s team, they had what the h/c called "tryouts". I snuck into the h/s softball field area without being seen - to see how my dd was doing - to see how she stacked up next to the older girls. What I saw was the h/c hitting fly balls 3 times farther for my dd then she was for the older girls - which I thought to myself, was 'ok, she is a freshman, she should have to work harder than the older girls'. The good thing - was she caught them, where the older girls couldnt waddle fast enough to get to the ones hit to them - they caught some, but come on. Then next, they put her on jv. Now most of those varsity girls - were not playing travel - but what I noticed is - most all of them shared the same body type, as the head coach. My kid stood out, being tall (compared to them), slim and athletic. The good thing is that our district was bad enough that they still made the playoffs - but once they got to real competition in the playoffs, a strong team from up north (populated by a group of her travel ball teammates), things didnt work out.

A great game plan, this other team of girls, who all oddly enough resembled my dd in body type, bunted - right between the over weight F1, the over weight F4 and the over weight F3. Since none of them could bend down far enough to get the ball, they got on base, over and over and over. 8-0 was the final score.

Amazing enough, probably from all that great h/s coaching, my dd does start now as a freshman, at a large strong D1 college. And all the girls, and her coaches there, all resemble her body type. In fact there are none of that body type shared by the previous h/c and her varsity team anywhere to be seen.

So be prepared - probably wont happen at your school - but its not uncommon. I told my girls that the h/s experience is practice for later in life when things just like this will happen.

[3Bsnag]

Donnie, does your youngest not play for them? Will she not get bashed for the coach remarks or the high school people just not on HB yet?

I love the honesty, but couldn't help thinking of K.

[Skarp]

How many you have had daughters play for very good club/travel teams with good coaching up until High School and then dd loses interest because of the program at High School. I know some lose it because of boys and other interests, but this is primarily because of her Dallas HS. Do you know of any dd's that have sat out of high school ball and only play club/travel ball? She hasn't asked me about it, but I wanted to be ready if she does.

My understanding is that Gone in 2.6's dd ran track in h.s., but didn't play softball at all. Elite, D1 kid. I'm sure there are others.

As long as dd understands the relative (in)significance of high school ball, the experience shouldn't sour her on the sport altogether, no matter how bad it is. Why should she care about the judgments/decisions of people whose opinions won't count at all where it matters?

[Black Mamba]

anonlooker, I think it depends on the coach my dd plays basketball and starts as a freshman on varsity but the coach made it clear from the start that the players that could help him win games would be the ones playing. The softball coach on the otherhand has never said what his coaching philosophy is and only time will tell.

I have no complaints my dd needs to earn her spot on varsity but politics do play a big part in the whole High School scene at least in our school it does. Good luck to all in Roundrock next weekend see yall on the dirt.

[DonnieS]

Donnie, does your youngest not play for them? Will she not get bashed for the coach remarks or the high school people just not on HB yet?

I love the honesty, but couldn't help thinking of K.

That h/c quit during the year a few years back to take a higher paying job in another district. She was a great game strategist - not kidding - not kissing up , wouldnt do any good anyway, she is gone, but had her player types and stuck to it.

Not much they could do to K anyway, she wont pitch this year as we hear it - h/c's favorite is going to pitch, and as we all know, you only need one pitcher anyway. No one ever gets hurt, or sick, etc. The reason K wont pitch is she is the best s/s we have - so no need to teach anyone else. The good thing about this is that K will get some good s/s time and she will learn a lot from the guy who coaches the infield - he is good, college baseball, knows the game. Of the 3 coaches, he is the only one that attends softball anywhere but what he has to, doubt that the other two coaches will be in RR. His kid catches on my team (committed to Cornell).

Three years ago, the other two coaches called me in for a meeting - it was late May - they wanted to know why I was opposed to them coaching the softball program. I was running late because I had just finished watch ULL beat Florida in a super regional - friggin awesome game. I said as I came in to the meeting - 'Sorry I am 2 minutes late, ULL was playing Florida - God what a game'. They said 'What ? - who?' I said "The womens college world series super regionals ! " They said "What - what are you are talking about". I said "Never Mind".

Honestly, they mean well - its just not in their blood like so many of us - so we just get the girls ready as best we can and then - take pictures.