ATTENTION ALL ASA SOFTBALL PEOPLE, MISSING PERSON REPORT APB

[texasglori]

All-points bulletin

News Channel 11 recieved a press release from investigators. It said Dan Adkins was missing, , around 11 a.m. Sunday after Region 7 Gold Qualifier.

The coach (i use that word with reservation), who lives in Georgia, said Dan Adkins has not been seen or heard from since Sunday, July 19.

Adkins is 45 years old, 5’8” tall, and weighs 180 pounds. The press release said the salt and pepper haired, hazel eyed man suffers from being conceided and telling his parents lies in order for them to join his Texas Glory Adkins organization. Last winter he boldly predicted his team would make it to Gold Nationals, but he failed to deliver. We think he is in hiding being a coward some where in Georgia but who knows. North Texas is better off that he is missing and hoping he is gone for good.

If you have information about Adkins location or have seen him please contact hey bucket

Congratulation to the true coach of the Texas Glory (Kevin Shelton) for once again makes it to Gold Nationals...Good luck!!!!

[txfastpitch]

That is hilarious. Although I bet he is hiding out somewhere at 14U Nationals, promising the young ones a spot on the Gold team.

Someday people will learn. No I doubt that.

[the1fan]

This is the funniest thing I have ever read. I am not even involved with these teams but that is AWESOME.

[Joe]

UPDATE - FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: FOUND....MINI-DICK, FORMER GLORY FAMILY THAT JUST CAN'T GET OVER IT....GOES BY TEXASGLORI

A micro-dork from North Texas has been located, hiding in a dark, stanky closet in his home by his wife and child. It seems that micro-dork has spent years trying to cast away his man crush for a fastpitch coach named Dippity Dan Adkins. The micro-dork's obsession for Dukey Dan came to the forefront after viewing the hit movie, Bruno. The situation is such that the image of Bruno brought back such fond memories of the Danster, that the micro-dork has now turned himself into the Home for the Mildly Gay for Glory Coaches, Past and Present.

More updates to follow....

[TRICKY DICK]

he is not with me