Have her play ASA. If the HS coach punishes your DD for not playing for him/her:
a) explain why she chose to play for the team that could qualify for ASA Nationals,
b) complain to the AD,
c) sue the HS coach for damages,
d) bend a reporter's ear, or
e) have your DD claim that the coach touched her inappropriately.
Its the american way.
If not...just deal with the consequences of your decision.