Where in the World did all these daddy ball teams come from?

[SDO12]

This constant defending of coaches is silly. It's the reason this topic never goes away.
On all teams there is hypocrisy and favoritism. Many talented kids have dads that coach but more have kids who are not that good but still play. These are the reasons that parents get upset. The whole start your own team rhetoric ?
How about just sticking to your word ? That same August speech where : The best 9 will play come bracket, the hitters will play. If you miss practice, blah blah blah Then come Sunday , the same old game.
Coaches also acting like the kids don't know who the better players are ? They do.
On a good note , college coaches look for kids with great attitudes, great work ethic and great grades.
Just like in life, those kids that had positions and playing time handed to them are now likely not playing or playing at a lower level.

[Sam]

This constant defending of coaches is silly. It's the reason this topic never goes away.
On all teams there is hypocrisy and favoritism. Many talented kids have dads that coach but more have kids who are not that good but still play. These are the reasons that parents get upset. The whole start your own team rhetoric ?
How about just sticking to your word ? That same August speech where : The best 9 will play come bracket, the hitters will play. If you miss practice, blah blah blah Then come Sunday , the same old game.
Coaches also acting like the kids don't know who the better players are ? They do.
On a good note , college coaches look for kids with great attitudes, great work ethic and great grades.
Just like in life, those kids that had positions and playing time handed to them are now likely not playing or playing at a lower level.

Anyone who has ever coached started doing it for their kid and if the other kids benefitted....great. I don't know if you have coached before, but I've done it for a lot of years. I really enjoyed coaching teams where I had no kid. On those teams I didn't have to come home after a three game friendly and explain to my wife why my daughter didn't play every inning of every game or why she was playing OF and not 2B. It's not easy. I didn't coach teams with National Championships in mind. I tried to improve all of my players. Some did very well, some didn't, but I think they all had fun playing for me.

It's not an easy thing to do and requires a huge amount of time and effort. In the end, bad coaches eventually are weeded out.....unless they are in 18G. Nobody will play for them.

The honest truth, though, is that there would be much fewer teams without "daddy ball" teams which would cause a huge growth in rec ball teams. Maybe not a bad thing, but a mathematical certainty. A whole lot of young ladies who are getting the TB experience would never get it if it weren't for these teams.

If your kid is great, keep complaining about these coaches. If she isn't great you better worship the ground they walk on because your kid might develop into a great player by playing TB and be picked up by one of the better coaches at some point. Just something to consider.

[SDO12]

Sam, you are truly super knowledgeable, I've read your stuff for years but it's not always about right or wrong, black or white. It's about facts. I truly appreciate all the coaches that coached my kid. Many coaches were realistic with their child's ability but many were not. Also playing favorites for friends kids, assistant coaches etc. My kid isn't great but ironically seeing a lot of the nonsense made her work harder to get to play. Along with a high GPA she got some $$ and is off to a big conference in August to play , but more importantly get a quality education. While there will always be volunteer dads that sacrifice time energy and $$ , there will be dads that start teams just so their kid will get to play all the time even though she may not deserve too. It's the reason this thread will never go away till the end of time. Parents just have to find a good fit for their kid. Yes , there will always be " daddy ball " teams and yes , this does create more teams and opportunity. The fact is , that many of these coaches create the havoc and stress because they play their kid or other kids that are not the best players on the team then try to justify their actions while taking money from parents as their kids sit. As said before, it's been going on for years and will continue , just a shame that it is truly avoidable. There will always be " those " parents , but until dad coaches are realistic with their child's ability if she is not a premium player , they have no leg to stand on when trying to "enforce "their policies for the team.

[Battle]

Maybe I've been lucky but it's been my experience, the coach's kid was usually one of the best on the team. Not always but usually.

Do you still coach?

I was afraid no one was going to pick up on that. It went a whole day.... . When I was coaching, my DD was average but she had the best coach in all the sport...ahum....well at least the loudest...

[eddiez577]

As a coach for both my kids, 14u SB and 12u BB, I feel it's my duty to not only work with everyone on the team, but also develop my kids as well and set a good example. It's true, you will be judged on how your own kids perform, so make sure they understand that what you're teaching them is not only to be one of the best players, but also to be leaders, and explain to them that this opportunity is entrusted to them and can be taken away just as fast.
I also have them do double duty and play for other coaches so they can earn their spots on that team as well. Again, not collecting trophies, but rather develop leaders. With the right mindset, the trophies will come.

[reyleen89]

Ok people I understand softball is a growing sport and I've been watching some games, all I can see is alot of daddy ball teams out there. Listen if you have the right mindset and are willing to train, compete and get your kids ready to recruitment by all means go for it but if not please don't pretend to coach and drag everyone on just because your hard headed. I recently saw games two weeks ago and watched girls make same mistakes over and over , parents being "THOSE" parents and no structure. We can't be hurting and and waisting these young ladies time. Coaches get it right

Dowhatulike- I so agree with you 100%. I am in the mist of looking for another team for my daughter. I am also tired of the daddy ball team why crazy how daughters stay in the whole game making the same mistake and other players who actually play that position are sitting and look like wow. crazy. I need a team where no dads have daughters on the team to where they actually care for the players and helping to push, challenge them in every way.

[eclipse09]

Ok people I understand softball is a growing sport and I've been watching some games, all I can see is alot of daddy ball teams out there. Listen if you have the right mindset and are willing to train, compete and get your kids ready to recruitment by all means go for it but if not please don't pretend to coach and drag everyone on just because your hard headed. I recently saw games two weeks ago and watched girls make same mistakes over and over , parents being "THOSE" parents and no structure. We can't be hurting and and waisting these young ladies time. Coaches get it right

Dowhatulike- I so agree with you 100%. I am in the mist of looking for another team for my daughter. I am also tired of the daddy ball team why crazy how daughters stay in the whole game making the same mistake and other players who actually play that position are sitting and look like wow. crazy. I need a team where no dads have daughters on the team to where they actually care for the players and helping to push, challenge them in every way.

You definitely can get in a "mist" trying to find the right coach. I would evaluate all coaches whether they have a kid on the team or not. My daughter's worst coach was an ex-college player that played favorites. She did not always play the best players. She is no longer coaching so I think the ones that are not very good get weeded out eventually.

Good luck to all looking for that right coach!!

[Blind Squirrel]

I have zero business advising anyone on parenting so this is simply my take:

Throughout both our kid's involvement in sports we focused on the behavior we believe is important in the workplace. Number one is doing everything you can to help your team be successful, including such things as playing out of position, batting anywhere in the lineup, doing your best whenever you're given the opportunity to help your team. This particularly applies to cases where you don't think everything is just the way you think they should be. Don't like the way the coach acts? Is bitching going to improve things? Unlikely. Is bitching about your boss the kind of behavior you want your kid to emulate when they're in the workplace? What is bitching about your boss likely to result in? Prolly not what was hoped for. If you have a problem with the team you're on then move on with a modicum of dignity and class. Burn bridges at your own risk. In the workplace or in the context of youth sports.

The world doesn't cater to average idiots like me. It seems like the most appropriate, reasonable thing to do is to carefully assess the situation and determine what course of action will best contribute to the desired outcome. I guess I never felt so entitled that I felt reflexive bitching about something I considered suboptimal is at all productive or contributes to the development of the adults that I wanted my kids to become. I wanted to raise rational problem solvers not freaking entitled whiners.

The above obviously does not apply to more serious matters such as child molestation. And if anyone thinks I possess some cosmic parenting knowledge that is guaranteed to produce perfect children/adults, then they have clearly never met me, my wife or my kids.

John Pappas

[Sam]

I have zero business advising anyone on parenting so this is simply my take:

Throughout both our kid's involvement in sports we focused on the behavior we believe is important in the workplace. Number one is doing everything you can to help your team be successful, including such things as playing out of position, batting anywhere in the lineup, doing your best whenever you're given the opportunity to help your team. This particularly applies to cases where you don't think everything is just the way you think they should be. Don't like the way the coach acts? Is bitching going to improve things? Unlikely. Is bitching about your boss the kind of behavior you want your kid to emulate when they're in the workplace? What is bitching about your boss likely to result in? Prolly not what was hoped for. If you have a problem with the team you're on then move on with a modicum of dignity and class. Burn bridges at your own risk. In the workplace or in the context of youth sports.

The world doesn't cater to average idiots like me. It seems like the most appropriate, reasonable thing to do is to carefully assess the situation and determine what course of action will best contribute to the desired outcome. I guess I never felt so entitled that I felt reflexive bitching about something I considered suboptimal is at all productive or contributes to the development of the adults that I wanted my kids to become. I wanted to raise rational problem solvers not freaking entitled whiners.

The above obviously does not apply to more serious matters such as child molestation. And if anyone thinks I possess some cosmic parenting knowledge that is guaranteed to produce perfect children/adults, then they have clearly never met me, my wife or my kids.

John Pappas

The Squirrel is wise and that's no BS......well it is actually BS = Blind Squirrel.

You all would do well to listen to this man. Raised one of the best players I ever coached against or had the pleasure of seeing play.

[E Train Dad]

I remember the Rec Ball day's, insert any board member and typically their kid wasn't good enough to make the All Star team, so they join the board to become a coach and get their kid on their All Star team! Then the move on to travel and bring their kid along for the ride.....the rest of the story has been already told in this thread!