Scared pitcher

[duanethayer]

My daughter is 13. She's a decent pitcher. She has a pitching coach. She plays travel. She got a come backer off the shin last month and hasn't been able to pitch ever since. The last 3 weekends her mechanics look like cap. She never wore a mask, so we got one to see if it would help but it didn't. Until today she's been saying she'll work it out. Now she says she doesn't like it and doesn't want to pitch anymore. I know there are some kids just not cut out for the position and maybe she's not mentally tough enough? I'm so fustrated with her stubbornness that I told her if she doesn't pitch I'll pull her from the team. Probably not the right way to go about it. My question is, is there a way to encourage her positively? Do I force her to stay at it or let her quit?

[Pale Rider]

Definitely do not force her to pitch. Why would you even give her such an ultimatum?
Let her play another position if she wants and let it run its course. She may come back to it, she may not, but P & C you have to want to be there or you are wasting your efforts.

x2

[duanethayer]

What about facing your fears? She use to be afraid of the ball when she was at bat, but she got over that. I don't want to force her, and I won't but I was hoping someone out there had the same experience and could give me other options. Thanks for your imput.

[PairOfAces]

What about facing your fears? She use to be afraid of the ball when she was at bat, but she got over that. I don't want to force her, and I won't but I was hoping someone out there had the same experience and could give me other options. Thanks for your imput.

Facing her fears is not the same as forcing her to pitch when she is clearly afraid of another injury. Maybe keep her in lessons to stay in pitching shape, but not have her get in the circle until she is ready. She may not ever be ready again, but that has to be her decision.

[as the world turns]

My daughter is 13. She's a decent pitcher. She has a pitching coach. She plays travel. She got a come backer off the shin last month and hasn't been able to pitch ever since. The last 3 weekends her mechanics look like cap. She never wore a mask, so we got one to see if it would help but it didn't. Until today she's been saying she'll work it out. Now she says she doesn't like it and doesn't want to pitch anymore. I know there are some kids just not cut out for the position and maybe she's not mentally tough enough? I'm so fustrated with her stubbornness that I told her if she doesn't pitch I'll pull her from the team. Probably not the right way to go about it. My question is, is there a way to encourage her positively? Do I force her to stay at it or let her quit?

A psychologist is needed............for yourself.

[Chin Music]

70% of the girls out there playin travel are "former" pitchers. Just a matter of when they stopped.
My oldest stopped at 15 and my youngest at 12. They both play and played in College.
Teach her how to hit!

[PDad]

The mental toughness required for pitching is mainly to continue focusing on making the next pitch to get the next out when things aren't going well. Sounds like your DD is afraid of getting hurt. The common element for both is self confidence, or the lack there of.

First step is taking the pressure off her and finding out what she's really thinking and feeling. If she won't open up to you, have someone else talk to her. If she's thought it through and made up her mind, don't force her. If she's unsure, be supportive in finding a way for her to work it out.

Lots of parents have made the mistake of forcing their kids to keep playing because they're living vicariously through them - and it often seriously harms their relationship. Much better to make it a life lesson by coaching your DD through the process of making an informed decision after considering the options and their ramifications.

Best wishes.

[E Train Dad]

Chin, Good advice, My DD is in 18U (Committed), been a pitcher since 8U, but always played the corners as well, always a hitting pitcher, hit .484 in HS last year as a Sophmore and .450 in travel, Teach her how to hit and she will always have a spot. That said, I remember her at your daughters age, she use to scoot to the back corner of the batters box because she was scared of the ball hitting her.......that was a year long learning curve, but trust me, weather they are scared in the box or scared in the circle, they get over it! She now leans into pitches, and plays the corners with no mask and too close in my opinion, to the batter for small ball! Her recruiting college coach now wants her to go back to pitching as a back up pitcher, It comes full circle! Just be positive and work with her with what works for her.....she will figure it out! Seems like wierd advice for that age, but it's true! Ask some of these guy's that have graduated their DD's, Just keep them happy and engaged and they will make the right decisions. If it's not their sport, than, so be it, but most times in my experience it is! Side story, We go to our daughters school she has been verbaled to, and the soccer field is above the SB field, you see the dad's chairs lined up against the fence watching the SB game......wishing their daughters played SB!

[jc1077]

give her time try her in another position just to get her confidence back, does she wear a mask if not i encourage you to buy her one that in itself can be a confidence booster

[artomatic]

I'm so frustrated with her stubbornness that I told her if she doesn't pitch I'll pull her from the team.

Sorry, but that might be the most messed up thing I have ever read on Heybucket.
If you try to force her to p[lay, she will most likely hate softball and hate you.
My advice is slow down and don't push her.
If she wants to play, she will, but it has to be her choice, same with pitching.

Trust me, your kid not being a pitcher isn't the worst thing that could happen. Having a daughter that pitches at the upper levels is a very stressful existence.