Tryouts - who jerks whom around the most?

[SouthPaw_Dad]

Hey Bucketers -

I would love your thoughts on who jerks whom around most at tryouts?

Full disclosure I am not a coach, nor do I care to be one. I am the pocketbook and chauffeur to my DD.

To provide some context I ask this because we have always tried to do the right thing, we don't take our team commitment lightly. Recently we have been tempted to just say yes and keep looking because we feel coaches are doing the same. My concern is that if coaches are doing it at this level - do they do it at the next level too

[AlwaysImprove]

Yes typically the do.

It is easy to lay this blame at the coaches feet. The reality is that he is likely responding to the pressures that the parents are put on him.

Most teams are architect as such:
- Top 5 players. Usually contains a pitcher. Then some hitting. A few other key spots on the field, like shortstop, catcher, first. Could be some speed slapper out fielder. You loose one of these, especially a top pitcher, your team fundamentally changes. Often breaks up.
- Mid 5 players. These are really good players, but if you loose one, you will have to work to find a replacement, but they are around.
- Low 5 players. These players are filling out your roster. Pretty easy to replace if one of these leave.

Those top 5 parents are often putting a lot of pressure on a coach to upgrade players in the lower 2 groups. They will often talk to many other parents/kids at the field looking for the better ones and try to draw them to the team. So often the coach is just reflecting what parents are asking of him.

You get to the big run teams, yeah there is a coach himself, and he is likely recruiting all the time. Big players like to join coaches that have big talent,

There is a network effect as you get to the better teams. Your chances of getting to a top 25 school are directly tied to being on a team full of top 25 recruits. So you are going to push hard to get on a stacked team. Which means you are going to go to the coaches that have spent the last 365 days recruiting his arse off.

[SouthPaw_Dad]

Thanks Always-

I am absolutely with you and love your analogy of top 5, mid 5 and lower 5. Makes complete cents! Not to mention the shit roles downhill with the "parent pressure"

I would love some additional thoughts from you or any Bucketer on how parents should act in each tier?

My DD could be the top tier on Team 1 and mid- pack on Team 2 and lower end on Team 3 should the parents act differently at tryouts for either tier?

I am tempted to say YES to Team 1 where my daughter is a star and keep searching for Team 2 where my daughter must compete for playing time.

Am I a fool to give loyalty to coaches at the cost of my DDs development especially when the loyalty isn't returned?

[Luther]

I think it depends on the age group.

When my DD was younger; we stuck through a lot of crap because we thought it was making her a better player in the long run. We would look for top teams as we thought it would develop the best skills; even if that meant minimal playing time. We would stay with a team and sometimes be jerked around by the coaches but we were OK with it.....

When she got older; we got more selfish and instead of looking for the "top" teams; we were looking for the team that offered the best balance of fields and playing time. If the team found the "next best thing" and our playing time suffered then we didn't hesitate to leave and look for a better fit. If the team did not participate in the right showcases or get decent fields then we did not hesitate to find a better fit. This lasted from 2nd year 14s until 2nd year 16s.

It then changed again once the kid got recruited...We no longer cared about fields or playing time and instead we were looking for a competitive team that had minimal travel and a group of girls that got along. We really just wanted the DD to stay in shape and still enjoy playing the game and not have to worry about switching teams.

[Sam]

From a coach's perspective:

If you say yes to me, I now count your kid as a member of my team and I fill the rest of my team based partly because of your commitment to our team. If I find out you are still looking, and you confirm that information, I will untether your connection to my team so that you can continue your search. I will also speak to the coach of the team you end up with to let them know that you are a nomad and will likely leave at the first opportunity.

If you base your selection on the notion that coaches will treat you badly, then you will earn the reputation of being a bad parent.

[Hinky]

Like this topic has some good comments Reboot
hard to tell when you're meeting someone for the first time how they may manipulate a situation. Hopefully can find a team that everyone has a common goal and hopefully stick to the plan they have talked about.
Coaches & Families. Though its hard to stick to a team plan when people leave or coaches change and quit. Or they change practice locations 50 miles away.
so IMO stick to your plan with your daughter.

[Tyler Durden]

Seemed like a reasonable choice of thread for this post...

I see 3 consecutive postings on the tryout board, all by the same coach looking for the same player, all within 18 hours. Not good etiquette, but this part is something I haven't seen posted before ---

"Refer Catcher to us : You get $ 100 if we sign them"


$100 if we sign them. Thoughts?

[ocarterok]

Seemed like a reasonable choice of thread for this post...

I see 3 consecutive postings on the tryout board, all by the same coach looking for the same player, all within 18 hours. Not good etiquette, but this part is something I haven't seen posted before ---

"Refer Catcher to us : You get $ 100 if we sign them"


$100 if we sign them. Thoughts?

WTH? 100.00 Dollars? who does that? Wow!

[Hinky]

so I wonder if that extends to all the families that brought their dd to play for them, everyone gets a hundred bucks when they get signed?!
don't really think teams need to post "lost a player due to family hardship" and then the reason.

Seemed like a reasonable choice of thread for this post...

I see 3 consecutive postings on the tryout board, all by the same coach looking for the same player, all within 18 hours. Not good etiquette, but this part is something I haven't seen posted before ---

"Refer Catcher to us : You get $ 100 if we sign them"


$100 if we sign them. Thoughts?

WTH? 100.00 Dollars? who does that? Wow!