Things you wish you could say at a game.

[CoachDave]

Thank you coach for letting everyone watching immediately know that it was the player and not you who was responsible for the bad decision.

Uhm....no all the players on the team are not as good as each other...but I can see where you are coming from...

I'm no physics expert But I don't think the catcher is to blame for the pitcher being wild.

Geez you seemed all gung-ho about the team until the first elimination game as you frantically tried to locate your daughter on the field.

No worries coach! Just because I'm talking to someone in the stands does not mean I'm bad mouthing you or the team.

In case you have forgotten, I have a list of all those things that you told us/promised us before the season started.

[MaizeNBlue]

You didn't get a smokin deal on her new bat.......you paid $299 + tax like the rest of us, so shut up !

[Safebyahare]

When opposing team is in outfield waiting on high fly ball.
"SNAKE!"

On the real side,,,,when my dd is in outfield I yell,,,"BUNNY!" "OH A KITTY!"
She hates me.
She looks.

[progapanda]

Innies and outies are belly buttons on bikini models not positions on a travel team. Stop it!!

[guero_gordo]

Just wondering coach, how many laps were you planning to run because of the mental mistakes you made?

[CheckWriter]

You are right coach. That typo of 3.0 when it should be 4.0 unweighted GPA doesn't matter. The Ivy League schools only care about her batting average. Don't worry about fixing before the showcase next weekend.

[3'sDad]

The (insert Ivy league School here) coach said" Don't worry about her 3.0 GAP/1500 SAT, we'll get her past Admissions and an athletic scholarship"......LOL

"Of course my kid has a full ride" (financial aid, student loans, merit scholarship & money from grandma)...LOL.

[triplecrown]

WOW that is exciting news for your DD to be offered by such a great school, you are the 15th person this Summer alone that has told me that XXXX Univ has offered them a "full ride", damn that school must have alot of money and a huge ass dugout

[Safebyahare]

During this past summer my dd played women's open.
We played this one team who made everyone laugh, because of what they said.
When their first batter struck out the dugout said "way to start us off"
When the next batter struck out tells the pitcher, "that's a hell of a rise ball you got"
When our pitcher came up to bat, third baseman says," hey aren't you the pitcher? when was the last time you got plunked?"
When another girls came up to bat, third baseman says ,"hey aren't you 2 for 2 against us?"
When a long fly ball got past their right fielder, the second baseman yells"you really do need to retire coach"

They weren't mean, they were comical.

[CoachMike]

Quit yelling "Great Eye DD"... on that change up that hit the dirt half way to home plate.