His worst lineup could beat the National Team. Umpires ask him for help. He takes charged trips to the circle with his mind. His round robins are square.
He is .......The Most Interesting Man on Heybucket.....
Run your mouth when I'm not around Its easy to achieve You cry to weak friends that sympathize - Pantera, Walk
He umps without a mask. As official scorekeeper, he doesn't use a book. He belts home runs ... when bunting. When coaching 3rd, he stands IN the coaching box.
When he slides head first into a base he comes up completely clean
When he walks he gets TWO bases
He conducts the pregame meeting at home plate and the umpires dont say a word
When he hits it out of the park (which is often), he doesnt jog the bases, he stays in the box and touches home and walks real slow back to dugout and tips his helmet to the crowd
PGF, Surf City and TCS all check with him before posting their schedules. He has won the lifetime achievement award - twice. He's the only person that can prove Skarp wrong.
He doesn't always post, but when he does, he prefers HeyBucket.