Best Thread Closers

[Skarp]

Sometimes threads here just wind down and die natural deaths. Still other times they are so manifestly uninteresting that nobody can be bothered to post anymore (see most of the threads that I initiate ). But there are times when a single post just flat-out nukes the thread (or at least leaves it with nowhere else to go).

Here's my favorite. The "Cash Money" thread gets 61 posts overall, and like 3 pages of furious posting within its last 24 hours, and then...

#1. A scholarship is not legal tender, is non-transferable (from the user's side), cannot be cashed in for legal tender, nor can it be traded for goods, valuables or services (other than those for which it was awarded).

#2. The declared cost to the supplier is just like that of an unused hotel room, intentionally inflated.

#3. The school is required to provide study assistance to all student-athletes, scholarship or not.

#4. The provided education in and of itself has zero street value. It is simply a tool which when properly applied can bring the world to the recipient's feet.

#5. Dogs consider feces to be an acceptable form of food.

....silence....

I laughed for about 5 minutes, and tried to conjure up a resuscitory response for about 2 days...couldn't do it. I know I'm weird, but to me that's like hitting a walk-off dinger.

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[katjoebenmom]

Skarp---you're right, that's a little gem of a thread killer, (so deliciously apropos of nothing). I swear I could hear crickets chirping.

How could you reply to something like that, lol? The straight arrows would be so horrified, they wouldn't want their post to even touch the border of that. And anyone with a sense of humor would recognize it for the masterpiece that it was and would want it to stand alone, the better to admire it.

A stunning non sequitur---Bravo sir, I say, Bravo.

[Cannonball]

If we all got together, we could decide which member was "The Thread Killer!" I'm not sure where I stand in that contest but have a shot with my posts in the drills section.